Oh.

I figure that this might just end up being some online journal where it seems like I'm talking to someone but really i'm just talking to myself.

So....I feel like I need to get this off of my blog chest.

Just for future reference. I don't have a religion as of now. Well...

I believe in the Abrahamic God. Allah, God...yeah.

But,

I don't know which one I am.

I was raised Judean Christian which is like Jews for Jesus only not as obnoxious plus, my mom made it up.

My mother is Christian but since Christianity came from Judeism, she wanted us to get the whole shebang. So...I celebrate Hannukah and then go and celebrate Christmas. Easter and Passover. etc etc.

On the other hand,

I started learning about Islam and I was really drawn to it. Like when I found out that Jesus is in Islam I was like "SAY WHAAAAAT?!?!?!?!" It really blew my mind. So now, ever since then, I have been torn.

I have tried A LOT of religions. I have tried to have NO religion. It failed immensely. I love God. I love love love God. He is amazing and beautiful and wonderful but do I love Allah? Or do I love God?

God? Allah? God....? Allah....?

It's constricting, I haven't moved out yet, so I can't go further into Islam until I'm outta house and home.

I don't know, it's complicated.

I mean, what if I choose the wrong one?

Islam doesn't have the trinity

Judeism doesn't have Jesus

Christianity doesn't have the Prophet.

Which is RIGHT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I just wish I could talk to someone who wouldn't jump down my throat if I didn't go his/her way.

I have a teacher who does A LOT of interfaith work, I'm going to ArabFest with her and I'm hoping that I'll learn more that way.

If anybody ever reads this, make Dua, pray for me. Do anything. An interpretive dance would be nice. A comforting poem perhaps!